Is it "Doing all the things" or is it FOMO?
I have a secret theory that the “Wanting to do all the things” is actually FOMO (Fear of missing out) in disguise.
I saw this tweet on Instagram the other day:
IMAGE READS: “Is there a name for the feeling when all you want out of life is to hunker down and eat pizza and watch movies but you also want to break new ground in your profession but you also want to quit society to live in the woods but you also want to do explore the world forever.” @DavidGilbert4U
I’m not judging. I often feel like that too.
I want to live in at least three places at once. I want to train full time to do a full iron distance triathlon and I also want to do coaching and breathwork as my full time thing. I also want to surf everyday. And, at the same time, I want to travel the world, and I want to have big chunks of space and time to write and play… and a whole bunch more.
Maybe you can relate?
So, all of this “wanting to do all of the things” reminds me of a research study about people purchasing jam (stay with me here, this isn’t the wild tangent it appears.)
In 2000 there was this experiment about the effect of excessive choice on grocery shopping habits*. One supermarket had a jam (that’s ‘jelly’ for my US viewers) section with a grand total of 6 different jams. The other supermarket had a jam section with 24-30 different jams.
The study found that, when faced with 24-30 different choices of jam, people took longer to choose their jams and… AND… were also more likely NOT to pick any jam at all – possibly because it was simply too overwhelming to choose which jam they wanted.
At the supermarket with 6 jams in the jam section, people were more likely to buy jam and… AND… their reported levels of satisfaction with their jam were such higher than those who had faced the choice of 24-30 jams.
So, let’s bring this back to us wanting to set up camp on the sofa, watch TV and eat pizza, and travel the world, and live in the woods, and go to that new bar in the city, and excel in your field all at the same time.
All those things are just like us facing off against those 24 jars of jam.
We’re going to feel overwhelmed. We’re more likely to walk away without making a decision – we’re more likely to stick with the status quo because there are just too many other options to choose from and it’s exhausting just thinking about them all.
We’re also more likely to take longer to figure out or find what we really want, PLUS, we’re going to be less likely to be happy with our decision.
With all those jams / life choices out there we’re always going to be wondering if we made the right decision.
We’re always going to be wondering if we are missing out.
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